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Here's the job that that Godless Communist Pooty McSpoor applied for:

We are Canada's largest Agency for Wines, Spirits & Beers.  Nihco International Limited has an excellent career opportunity for an accomplished Sales Professional to sell its wide range of products.  We have an opening in our Vancouver Branch for the following position:

Sales Representative

Send, in confidence, a handwritten cover letter, resume and salary history to

Nihco International Limited
555 West 3rd Avenue
Vancouver, BC
V6J 1K7
Attn: Personnel

Here's his letter, the flatulent little dickwad:

Enclosed please find my Resume, in response to your search for a Sales Representative.

Please hire me.  I really want this job.  Please, oh please please.  Don't make me beg.  Don't make me lose my dignity.  I really, really, really want to work for you, and you will like me once you get to know me.  This is my last chance.  Don't make me kill myself.  You don't want my death on your conscience.

Thanks you for considering my application.  I look forward to a favourable response in the very near future.

Yours truly,
Pooty McSpoor

Fortunately, the wise people at Nihco International had the good sense not to reply.


  September 9, 1999


copyright Don Magor 1999, 2000 all rights reserved